First, here are some links for you to check out....Go ahead... I'll wait...
Toy Gun Buy Back
Violence and Toy Guns
Now, here is a little background info about me and my younger siblings.
My sister and I were never really big into playing with toy weapons but my brother had a few toy guns and what not. It was widely accepted in our community that little boys played with toy guns (cops and robbers, pretend hunting, etc). The only rule about playing with toy guns in our home was that we were never supposed to point a gun, real or toy, at another person. To this day, it makes me uneasy if my child points his toy gun at his siblings or even the dog.
Now. Let's look at today's recent events.
School shootings everywhere.
Violence on the rise.
Kidnappings, Murders, etc.
So what is different today than it was when we were younger?
Is it video games? Maybe...
Is it toy guns? I doubt it.
Is it TV shows glorifying murder? Maybe.
I think ultimately it comes down to family. There seems to be more families these days in which both parents work. I'm not saying this a bad thing in no way. I, myself, work full time and if my husband wasn't disabled, he would be working as well. It's the only way to make ends meet in today's financial environment.
However, would families benefit more from having one parent at home and available to be involved in the children's lives 100%? Of course! It's just not realistic these days though.
I think a huge thing is communication between parents and their children. Encourage your children. Support them. Praise them. Brag on them.
When I first got married, I read a lot of books and sought a lot of advice from other people whose marriages seemed fulfilling and long lasting. One of the most consistent things I was told was to never speak badly of your spouse in front of others. What if we applied this to our children as well? What if we only speak positively about our children in front of others. If we have an issue with our child, we discuss it with them on a level they understand.
I'm not saying I do this.
I am, in no means, the perfect parent. This is something I have only thought about today. But it is something that I am going to try my best to put into practice. It is hard sometimes, especially for those of us who have little patience.
So back to the subject at hand. What is so different now?
Have we gotten to busy to be parents? I am always working, planning outings with my husband or friends, etc... When do I actually set aside time to spend with each child separately or collectively? The sad truth is not very often.
This is my plan for my family to try to help and reduce the amount of violence in the world...
Monitor the video games
Make sure the video games that my children are playing are age appropriate and discuss them with my child.
Monitor the music
I love music. But at some level, you are what you listen to. When I drive to work, I make a point to listen to upbeat, confident music to help me be at my best throughout the day. Therefore, I will also monitor the music my children listen to and discuss it with them to see what their thoughts are on certain songs.
Encourage and lift up my child
I am going to try from here on out to try only to speak positively about my child. If I have an issue with him/her, I will do my best to discuss it with that child.
Spend time with each child separately
I plan on trying to spend time with each child individually. This is difficult because my children often go to their grandparents, etc on the weekends but this also makes for a valuable opportunity to keep one of the children home to spend time with just him/her.
So here is my plan... What's yours?
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Update on 26 Acts of Kindness...
Eventually, my husband joined me in my 26 Acts of Kindness.
We came to a point where we felt like posting about our acts was not appropriate. If our acts are done out of kindness, we felt it should be completely anonymous. So I decided not to post each act here or elsewhere.
It was quite an experience.
Seeing the smiles on people's faces was incredible.
We should all do at least one random act of kindness each day.
Blessings to you.
We came to a point where we felt like posting about our acts was not appropriate. If our acts are done out of kindness, we felt it should be completely anonymous. So I decided not to post each act here or elsewhere.
It was quite an experience.
Seeing the smiles on people's faces was incredible.
We should all do at least one random act of kindness each day.
Blessings to you.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
JOSEPHINE GAY - AGE 7
 |
| Josephine Gay, Age 6 |
Josephine Gay had just turned 7, three days before the shooting.
She liked to ride her bike on her family's quiet cul-de-sac, and over the summer she set up a lemonade stand, according to CNN.
Josephine loved the color purple. On Monday, there were purple balloons attached to her family's mailbox, and on the mailboxes of all the neighbors. The yellow house she lived in had a jungle gym out back.
A person who answered the phone at Mother of God Catholic Church in Covington, Ky., said Josephine was the great-niece of the pastor, Father Raymond Hartman.
Polly Larsen in Sunnyvale, Calif., said she was close friends with the cousin of Josephine's mother.
"`Joey' is a beautiful little girl, may she never be forgotten and live forever in our hearts," Larsen wrote on Facebook.
Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2012/12/17/officials-release-names-victims-in-connecticut-elementary-school-shooting/#ixzz2FpHxxWHU
Random Act of Kindness #2 In Memory of little "Joey" Gay - Gave card with $5.00 in it to cashier at Wendy's. it was an incredibly busy day for her and she looked like she could really use a pick me up.
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Charlotte Bacon - Age 6
CHARLOTTE BACON, 6
They were supposed to be for the holidays, but finally on Friday, after hearing much begging, Charlotte Bacon's mother relented and let her wear the new pink dress and boots to school.
It was the last outfit the outgoing redhead would ever pick out. Charlotte's older brother, Guy, was also in the school but was not shot.
Her parents, JoAnn and Joel, had lived in Newtown for four or five years, JoAnn's brother John Hagen, of Nisswa, Minn., told Newsday.
"She was going to go some places in this world," Hagen told the newspaper. "This little girl could light up the room for anyone."
Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2012/12/17/officials-release-names-victims-in-connecticut-elementary-school-shooting/#ixzz2Fe2cSJYw
RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS #1 - IN HONOR OF CHARLOTTE BACON, AGE 6...
Sent cards to 2 teachers and 1 bus driver letting them know how much we appreciate them.
#26Acts of Kindness.....
#26Acts of kindness you can do right now
So i've been reading a lot about these 26 acts of kindness in memory of the 26 people who lost their lives in the Connecticut shooting. I started trying to do my random acts the past few days.... As I do one, I will post it on my blog - not to brag but to honor a specific victim each day.... I've already done a few so I will make a new post for each one....
So i've been reading a lot about these 26 acts of kindness in memory of the 26 people who lost their lives in the Connecticut shooting. I started trying to do my random acts the past few days.... As I do one, I will post it on my blog - not to brag but to honor a specific victim each day.... I've already done a few so I will make a new post for each one....
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Veterans Day 2012
I want to honor all our veterans past and present so if you or a family member are a veteran, please comment the name, branch, and rank for us all to see so we can say
Thank You....
All Gave Some and Some Gave All....
As I see all the posts and watch all the videos in honor of Veterans' Day, I can't help but to think of our veterans and their families and all the sacrifices they have made in the name of freedom. I think we take our freedom for granted entirely too much.
Everyone wants to complain about the government, the election, etc but I think we all need to take a moment and think how BLESSED we are to have the FREEDOM to complain!!!
There are wives sitting at dinner tables with their children and an empty chair where "Daddy" should be sitting. There are mothers who cry themselves to sleep at night missing their sons and daughters. There are husbands tucking their children into bed at night and helping them to say a prayer for "Mommy" who is so far away. There are fathers who choke back tears as they listen to the patriotic songs play as they think about their child who is fighting for our country.
There is the husband, daughter, son, wife who is fighting for our country in a foreign land far away from their children, spouse, parents. Everyday they fight. Their's is a 24/7 job with no escape. Not really. Not even when they finally come home. The things they have seen, the experiences they have been through - will forever be with them. It influences every fiber of their being. Every moment of every day.
The LEAST we as a country can do is take a moment and tell our veterans how much we appreciate them.
I personally wish there was more I could do to show my appreciation. To show them how thankful I am for them fighting so I don't have to. To show them while I will never truly understand how much they have sacrificed, I do recognize it and appreciate it.
So to them I say...
Thank You.
Saturday, November 10, 2012
Rocky Terrain brings about Beauty
Sometimes it is so frustrating to go from having an incredible support group of friends around you to having very few.
At one point, you have people asking how you are doing, bringing meals by, offering to help with household chores, etc...
And then next thing you know, nearly everyone forgets about you.
I say NEARLY everyone.
There are a few who still remember. They still come check on you. They still bring you meals and offer to help in anyway they can.
THOSE are your true friends.
Some people get so into helping others. This isn't always a bad thing. But when you go searching for "bigger" and "better" situations to help with, maybe the motive behind it all isn't what it should be.
I have found that I have some incredible friends. I am thankful for the experiences my family has had to go through. It has helped us discover who we can trust and count on. It has made us stronger. It has made us appreciate our friendships.
The experiences have had an effect on me in both positive and negative ways. I am bitter. I am angry. I feel betrayed. But I have learned a lot about people.
Experiences change people.
Sometimes for the good. Sometimes for the bad. It's really up to the person who is going through it to decide how it's going to effect and change them.
I choose good.
I choose to cherish my friendships and to return all the joy they have given to me.
At one point, you have people asking how you are doing, bringing meals by, offering to help with household chores, etc...
And then next thing you know, nearly everyone forgets about you.
I say NEARLY everyone.
There are a few who still remember. They still come check on you. They still bring you meals and offer to help in anyway they can.
THOSE are your true friends.
Some people get so into helping others. This isn't always a bad thing. But when you go searching for "bigger" and "better" situations to help with, maybe the motive behind it all isn't what it should be.
I have found that I have some incredible friends. I am thankful for the experiences my family has had to go through. It has helped us discover who we can trust and count on. It has made us stronger. It has made us appreciate our friendships.
The experiences have had an effect on me in both positive and negative ways. I am bitter. I am angry. I feel betrayed. But I have learned a lot about people.
Experiences change people.
Sometimes for the good. Sometimes for the bad. It's really up to the person who is going through it to decide how it's going to effect and change them.
I choose good.
I choose to cherish my friendships and to return all the joy they have given to me.
In Memory of Ashley Rain on what would have been her upcoming 14th birthday
Help me celebrate Ashley's 14th birthday please.
This is an opportunity to help me heal and help me remember her in a positive way.
Roger N Niki Martin Fundraising Page - Roger N Niki Martin's Personal Page for The Fifth Annual Charge It for CHARGE
This is an opportunity to help me heal and help me remember her in a positive way.
Roger N Niki Martin Fundraising Page - Roger N Niki Martin's Personal Page for The Fifth Annual Charge It for CHARGE
Friday, November 9, 2012
The Show Goes On...
I think we all have those days where we feel like giving up; where it seems like no matter what we do, we can't win.
This song is one that helps me remember not to give up - to be determined and to not worry about the little things. I love this song.
Hope you enjoy it too....
My favorite part:
So no matter what you been through, no matter what you into
No matter what you see when you look outside your window
Brown grass or green grass, picket fence or barbed wire
Never ever put them down, you just lift your arms higher
Raise 'em 'til your arms tired let 'em know you here
That you struggling, survivin', that you gon' persevere
Yeah, ain't nobody leavin', nobody goin' home
Even if they turn the lights out, the show is goin' on
This song is one that helps me remember not to give up - to be determined and to not worry about the little things. I love this song.
Hope you enjoy it too....
My favorite part:
So no matter what you been through, no matter what you into
No matter what you see when you look outside your window
Brown grass or green grass, picket fence or barbed wire
Never ever put them down, you just lift your arms higher
Raise 'em 'til your arms tired let 'em know you here
That you struggling, survivin', that you gon' persevere
Yeah, ain't nobody leavin', nobody goin' home
Even if they turn the lights out, the show is goin' on
Monday, October 29, 2012
14 years ago...
14 years ago today, I was pregnant with my first child.
The nursery was decorated in pink and white. The baby bed was set up and waiting for it's new arrival. Pretty little dresses hung neatly in the closet. A stack of tiny diapers sat on a changing table beside a rocking chair. Everything was in place. Ready for the day Ashley Rain made her debut.
November 18th 1998.
I woke up spotting. I took Ashley's father to work and then drove myself to the hospital to be checked. I was 38 weeks pregnant so was excited at the possibility of finally meeting this tiny baby. I was admitted into the labor and delivery unit and was confirmed to be in labor. I was hooked up to monitors and given an epidural. I had absolutely no pain. Everything seemed to be progressing normally. Finally that evening, the dr came to deliver my first child. The labor went fine. The delivery seemed to go fine. But instead of giving her to me, the doctor quickly passed her off to a nurse who whisked her out of the room.
This was the moment that changed my life forever.
I kept asking for my baby.
I was told, "She's ok, just having a little trouble breathing."
After what seemed like hours, the dr finally came back in the room and informed me that my daughter had something wrong with her nasal cavities. They were transferring her to Birmingham to a NICU immediately.
The worst news any mother can receive.
I was just barely 20 years old.
I was so inexperienced at life.
I was so niave.
Ashley never got to come home. That was the last time she was ever in my hometown.
That was the last time some members of my family ever saw her alive.
November 18, 2012 would have been her 14th birthday.
Sometimes life isn't fair. But we learn from our trials. We learn how strong we can be. Even in weakness, we can find strength.
My storm isn't over. By far.
Not a day goes by that I don't think about her. Miss her. Wonder how my life would be now if she had been born healthy or even if she had just lived a little longer. All the "what ifs"....
The thing is, you have to learn to adapt to living in the storm. Every once in a while, the sun breaks through the storm clouds. Every once in a while, a rainbow shines through.
The nursery was decorated in pink and white. The baby bed was set up and waiting for it's new arrival. Pretty little dresses hung neatly in the closet. A stack of tiny diapers sat on a changing table beside a rocking chair. Everything was in place. Ready for the day Ashley Rain made her debut.
November 18th 1998.
I woke up spotting. I took Ashley's father to work and then drove myself to the hospital to be checked. I was 38 weeks pregnant so was excited at the possibility of finally meeting this tiny baby. I was admitted into the labor and delivery unit and was confirmed to be in labor. I was hooked up to monitors and given an epidural. I had absolutely no pain. Everything seemed to be progressing normally. Finally that evening, the dr came to deliver my first child. The labor went fine. The delivery seemed to go fine. But instead of giving her to me, the doctor quickly passed her off to a nurse who whisked her out of the room.
This was the moment that changed my life forever.
I kept asking for my baby.
I was told, "She's ok, just having a little trouble breathing."
After what seemed like hours, the dr finally came back in the room and informed me that my daughter had something wrong with her nasal cavities. They were transferring her to Birmingham to a NICU immediately.
The worst news any mother can receive.
I was just barely 20 years old.
I was so inexperienced at life.
I was so niave.
Ashley never got to come home. That was the last time she was ever in my hometown.
That was the last time some members of my family ever saw her alive.
November 18, 2012 would have been her 14th birthday.
Sometimes life isn't fair. But we learn from our trials. We learn how strong we can be. Even in weakness, we can find strength.
My storm isn't over. By far.
Not a day goes by that I don't think about her. Miss her. Wonder how my life would be now if she had been born healthy or even if she had just lived a little longer. All the "what ifs"....
The thing is, you have to learn to adapt to living in the storm. Every once in a while, the sun breaks through the storm clouds. Every once in a while, a rainbow shines through.
Friday, January 6, 2012
Long Awaited Update
I had started keeping a blog at another site though it is not the same as this one. This is the more "what's going on with my life" type of blog - the other one is more about emotions that I go through. Soooo I just realized I haven't been in this one in a year! WOW!
Here's what going on NOW....
I am 2 quarters away from graduating with an associates in surgical technology. I have maintained a 4.0 the entire time, am a mentor, and also a member of the Gamma Beta Phi Honor Society. Never thought I would or COULD be where I am today... I LOVE LOVE LOVE Surg Tech...
E is now almost 16 months old - he is amazing! He is growing so fast and has so much joy. I love when he smiles because his eyes smile too. It just melts your heart... <3
O is 5 and is still my little diva. She tends to get in trouble at school because she LOVES to talk... Her teacher actually sent me a note home saying "She's wearing me out"... lol... I wanted to send one back that said, "Now you know how we feel" LOL
J went to his first dance =) He had a great time. He is also playing basketball this year. He is growing up entirely too fast. He's having some problems with Math at school but has A/B in everything else.
A is 4 months clean. I am so incredibly proud of her. She looks like a totally different person. She looks like a gorgeous young woman. She comes and stays with us every so often.
Hubby is doing okay. He had to go into the hospital recently due to fluid build up around his heart and lungs as a result of the steroids. The steroids are rough on him. But he's doing better than he was...
We are in a very weird place in our lives right now. We are trying to work through it and get back on top but it's so hard when so many people have turned their backs on us. But I have decided I'm not going to focus on the friends that I lost (b/c if they were really my friends to start with, they would still be here with us instead of judging us). I'm going to focus on the friends we have. Because those are the ones that are our true friends. It's just hard b/c we are so scared to trust any of them. Because we did trust them and then we got stabbed in the back. But the main thing I try to remember is that we got each other. Hubby is my best friend. My family is my everything. I love them with all of my heart. I am so blessed to have them.
AND THAT IS ALL THAT MATTERS
Here's what going on NOW....
I am 2 quarters away from graduating with an associates in surgical technology. I have maintained a 4.0 the entire time, am a mentor, and also a member of the Gamma Beta Phi Honor Society. Never thought I would or COULD be where I am today... I LOVE LOVE LOVE Surg Tech...
E is now almost 16 months old - he is amazing! He is growing so fast and has so much joy. I love when he smiles because his eyes smile too. It just melts your heart... <3
O is 5 and is still my little diva. She tends to get in trouble at school because she LOVES to talk... Her teacher actually sent me a note home saying "She's wearing me out"... lol... I wanted to send one back that said, "Now you know how we feel" LOL
J went to his first dance =) He had a great time. He is also playing basketball this year. He is growing up entirely too fast. He's having some problems with Math at school but has A/B in everything else.
A is 4 months clean. I am so incredibly proud of her. She looks like a totally different person. She looks like a gorgeous young woman. She comes and stays with us every so often.
Hubby is doing okay. He had to go into the hospital recently due to fluid build up around his heart and lungs as a result of the steroids. The steroids are rough on him. But he's doing better than he was...
We are in a very weird place in our lives right now. We are trying to work through it and get back on top but it's so hard when so many people have turned their backs on us. But I have decided I'm not going to focus on the friends that I lost (b/c if they were really my friends to start with, they would still be here with us instead of judging us). I'm going to focus on the friends we have. Because those are the ones that are our true friends. It's just hard b/c we are so scared to trust any of them. Because we did trust them and then we got stabbed in the back. But the main thing I try to remember is that we got each other. Hubby is my best friend. My family is my everything. I love them with all of my heart. I am so blessed to have them.
AND THAT IS ALL THAT MATTERS
Saturday, January 22, 2011
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
YAY!
I am back online! Something happened to my blog and for an extended period of time, I was unable to log in. Crazy, huh? Sooooo - I guess an update is in store! We had our baby! He is now almost 6 months old and is the most amazingly happy baby. He loves to eat... lol!He is much bigger than the picture - It was taken shortly after he was born.I am doing great - I have decided to go back to school to follow my dream of Surgical Technology. I am so excited about it. I work during the day and go to school in the evenings. Busy, busy, busy.
A week after our baby was born, my husband started have severe double vision. We took him to the ER and they couldn't figure out what was going on with him. We saw several more physicians but long story short, he has been diagnosed with Myasthenia Gravis. It has been a very difficult process. Imagine one day being fine, able to do what ever you want and than wake up the next day and all of the sudden the smallest of tasks leaves you with difficulty breathing, muscle weakness, difficulty walking, double vision.... It's been a process adjusting to our new life. He has to go in the hospital about every 4 weeks for treatment. It is so frustrating because it seems like the treatments are getting less and less effective. We go see a neuromuscular specialist on our 3rd anniversary. Hopefully he will have some new options for us.
The kids are all doing great. We all recently moved and are loving our new place. Guess that's all for today - I will be blogging more now. :) Leave me some comments, Come on folks, Show us some love! lol!
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Random Thoughts
~ It was brought to my attention that I "don't reach out" to people. I never thought about this before but it is true. I am a very private person who doesn't like reaching out to others. I tend to push them away. Husband told me he was impressed b/c I was reaching out to one person in particular and how uncommon that was for me. I wonder why I'm like that? Any ideas?
~ A friend gave me a guinea pig. It promptly passed away the next day. Sometimes I feel like the angel of death. I had such a guilt complex over it b/c it was a new friend of mine and this had been a dear pet to her and her children and now I felt like I was somehow responsible for the death of this animal. Even though I know rationally I didn't do anything wrong, I still feel guilty. :/
~ Exhausted. What more is there to say. I'm so tired. I feel like an alien has taken control over my body and I can't do anything like I used to could (like bend over to paint my toenails...). Sighhhhhhhhh
~ A friend gave me a guinea pig. It promptly passed away the next day. Sometimes I feel like the angel of death. I had such a guilt complex over it b/c it was a new friend of mine and this had been a dear pet to her and her children and now I felt like I was somehow responsible for the death of this animal. Even though I know rationally I didn't do anything wrong, I still feel guilty. :/
~ Exhausted. What more is there to say. I'm so tired. I feel like an alien has taken control over my body and I can't do anything like I used to could (like bend over to paint my toenails...). Sighhhhhhhhh
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Niki Niki - I mean, Moto Moto....
This is like the soundtrack that plays when I am trying to get up out of a chair, trying to walk across a parking lot - or pretty much all the time... lol....
Friday, June 11, 2010
i hate death.
i hate death. i hate the arrogant way it creeps into ur life and tries to consume every waking moment, every aspect. i hate the way it rips someone or something u love away usually without even the chance to say goodbye. i hate the way it lingers on even after the fact, trying to steal every little ounce of happiness u attempt to grasp onto. i hate the way it makes ur life seem to become frozen in a moment of time, how it changes ur aspect of life to before death came and after death came. it seems to mock u when u think u have finally achieved triumph over it. it always finds a way to sneak back in, to bring up things u could've, should've done differently. i hate death.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Weep.
The Weeping Willow comes to mind today because my "bess fran"s brother passed away last night. He was a young man. They suspect it had something to do with his diabetes. But wow. The pain that family is going through. It breaks my heart. I have never lost a sibling so I don't try to pretend to know the sorrow she feels. I lost my child so I can only imagine that it is a similar type of pain.
This family is in my thoughts and prayers. Please join me in praying for them as they go through this difficult time.
Belly
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